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Monday, June 23, 2008
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Dead People Suck
I'm not usually one to get all "et memoriam" about a recently deceased celebrity. Nine times out of ten I'm just momentarily glad they're dead, and then I get on with my full day of being alive.
A few moments ago I got the news that George Carlin Died. Now, when it comes to celebrity deaths, I sometimes wait a few days before I take the news seriously. After all, both Stephen King and Charlie Sheen were prematurely declared dead by news publishers desperate to get the scoop. And in the Charlie Sheen case, it was almost a year and a half before I heard that he was still alive. But, for the purposes of this context, his actual status of life is not important. What is important is getting the news that he died.
I've had to deal with death on some level or another over the last few years. Members of my family have died from various illnesses or general old age, as well as hearing second-hand of the deaths of old friends or friends' family. The most troubling part of it for me has been the fact that, so far, I haven't really cared.
I've lost quite a few people from my life. Some closer than others. And while everyone around me mourns, cries, copes, memorializes, and any other of the ceremonious acts of dealing with a "loss," I...don't.
I suppose it is a testament to how lucky I've been so far. My parents are still alive. My children are healthy and happy. My siblings are full of life. The very small gathering people whom I have chosen to really count on as True Friends are all still in this world. So, compared to some, I have never really, truly had a loss...Unless you count my dog. I cried when my dog died. That's it so far, though.
So what does that say about me? Am I so shallow and soulless that I just don't care about the lives of others. No, if that were the case, I'd be a Republican. Am I in denial of some kind? No, because if I were to be in denial, it we me a more convenient fantasy like "at least they've gone to heaven." Am I emotionally repressed? I don't think so. If that were the case, why would I even bother emoting at all, in speech, or writing of any kind?
It seems to me that when I hear of the death of someone, be they stranger or family, rather than suddenly being saddened by the "loss," I find myself soon becoming alarmed as to why I'm not "saddened by the loss." My questions and reasoning jump around from the simple lack of "real connection" to the deceased, to blaming past experience for deadening my emotions concerning grief, to questioning whether or not I may be the only one who is actually being honest with myself while everyone else is just pretending to feel what everyone expects them to.
It's upsetting subject matter to me, and even more upsetting that it keeps coming to my attention. Like I said, maybe it's just as simple as not having lost anyone that close to me. If that's the case, I'm fine with it. In fact, that would be the one kind of ignorance that I'd be happy to embrace.
Whatever it may be, it just happened to be on my mind today, because I heard that George Carlin died and that upset me.
TTFN
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Hob-Knobbin' (sp?)
Out Of The Loop
Stunted Growth
Off Topic: Culture For Sale
Don't Do Me No Favors
Bored Now...
You Think That's Funny?
The Plot Thickens
Assassination Plot
Debate This!
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