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Monday, March 10, 2008
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Bored Now...
Things were going so well.
As I started on this whole Election Year Extravaganza I was pumped and excited about becoming a full-fledged fanboy of my all-time favorite show. But, let's face it. We're still a full nine months away from The Big Day, and they have been Jumping Sharks left and right.
McCain has officially marched resiliently and steadfastly like a Hitler Youth to the Republican Ticket, and Clinton and Obama's infighting for the Democratic Nomination becomes more like a sandbox fight over a firetruck every day.
And all the pointless jack-off articles about whether or not "Mikey" from the Life Cereal commercials agrees with Hilary's Foreign Aide Policy do nothing more than fill me with the urge to file my fingers down to sharp points and stick them into my own eyes.
The media knew full well that this was going to be the fight of the century, but like all other idiot television producers, they have no idea how to pace themselves. I'm tired of shows like Lost and Heroes taking six months to three years to get to the goddamn point. And I hate it even more when they throw everything of any substance they have out in the first two weeks and then suddenly realize "Oh shit, we still have six more months of this to fill. Quick, let's send the cast to Spring Break!"
I could just fill this blog up with hour-by-hour reactions to every little newsbit that gets churned out by the world's longest and most boring Prom Queen Pageant, but that's just not how I roll. I can't just burst out snide one-liners and katty minimalistic blurbs over every minor press release. I'm still a slave the well-trained need to formulate, argue, prove and expand on a point (with plenty of snide one-liners and katty blurbs peppered throughout). Doing any less would drop me into the same level as that living example of why MTV should be taken off the air; Perez Hilton. I may be low, but at least I'm human.
And while I am perfectly capable of giving that treatment to so many juicy steaming piles of shit that get dropped into the Cortex every day, doing so would only result in repeating myself...over and over and over and over. It's not just that they are all such amazing fuckheads, it's that they are amazingly consistent and repetitive fuckheads.
But, I did go through a lot of trouble to re-decorate this place. And really, what would the world be like if I didn't give it my constant injection of "You Know You're A Dipshit, Right?" And, after all, the whole foundation of my "being a better person" thing that I started back in '05 involves a lot of "not giving up" just because something is "too hard, boo hoo."
And so, on I drudge. I'll try to get back to at least a daily update on all things Politioso, and if I can summon up the courage (or keep down my lunch) perhaps more than one a day. It is suppose to be fun, after all.
Smile Naked, America.
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You Think That's Funny?
The Plot Thickens
Assassination Plot
Debate This!
The Race Cards
Let's Get This Party Started
Where I Stand
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You're Dead To Me Now
2008....Already?
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